When You Mother Him…
BY Monica Yates
When you mother him, you aren’t trusting him to do it himself.
Women ask, how do i make sure i don’t mother him when his love language is acts of service
𝙷𝚎𝚛𝚎 𝚒𝚜 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚊𝚗𝚜𝚠𝚎𝚛:
It’s about the energy. it’s about are you trusting that he can do it himself, or are you already assuming that he’ll forget.
E.g. “don’t forget to do you washing” “can you put away your dishes” “you need to book in your annual doctor appointment” ”remember we have dinner tonight”
It’s the energy of ‘i have to look after you because if i dont, you won’t look after yourself” — that’s what mothers are for (my mum included lol. They make sure we don’t die essentially hahah)
When you are constantly reminding him of things…
1) You don’t let him pursue you and lead you and
2) You are saying that he is not enough of a man to do it himself.
The Lover (because you are his lover, not his mother) is the energy of ‘i get to love you, cherish you, support you, fuck you ;), honour you’.
This means that you can still do things to nurture and look after him, but the energy is different.
And just to be clear, a man loves a nurturing woman. And you can be a nurturing lover.
IT’S BECUSE YOU WANT TO. It’s because you get pleasure out of looking after him.
I love being nurturing, AND i don’t do it because i have to. I do it because i get pleasure out of it. (Plus it’s a hot dynamic that can make for a spicy sub/Dom situation later…”daddy” ;))
If you are not trusting him to have integrity, you’ll likely mother him.
If you are trusting him to be the man, and you want to support him and be warm to him, you’re likely still in the lover archetype .
Grounded, secure masuline men will have integrity .. which will 100% support you in this.
So there also is a component where this mother energy can be brought out in insecure situations (FYI)
If you want more of this – it’s all in BLNM! Including the topic of “what if i make more money than him and pay for most things….how can i still be the feminine?”
BLNM is finally open again!! For more on this …. join it and thank me later 😉